General Election 2017 explained using 34 real racehorse names!

Photo courtesy of Business Insider

We’ve reached the final furlong of the 2017 General Election, so here’s our analysis of General Election 17 using real racehorse names!

Party Politics has been all the talk after the Snap election was called by Sweet Theresa in April, saying she needed a majority to deal with Brexit and the negotiations ahead. Master Corbin was so far behind in the Opinion Poll’s, she looked to be On The Bridle galloping towards 8th June.

However, Jeremy had other ideas, and with his Manifesto launched promising a New Approach, an end to Privatisation and more wages for the Workforce, he’s proven to be a dour stayer and closing to be almost neck-and-neck coming down the straight.

Meanwhile Theresa May has been Dodging Bullets from the media after she had apparently Gone Missing during the leadership debates. She maintains she’s the Best Leader, a Strong Lass and a Stable Girl. She’ll be getting out the Blue Bunting if they can continue the Tories Long Run in Downing Street.

It looks like the Democratic Boys led by Captain Tim will have to settle for the minor placings, they’ve been tailed off in a two-horse race.

The race is on for top cabinet spots too, will we see Amber Beat, and Our Diane sat in the Home Office? Will Boris The Bold be head of all things Foreign and will the Choice Exchequer be One For Philip or Johnnie Red?

So Thursday’s election decides if it’s the End Of May at the start of June, or whether we Welcome In May once again to No.10. The Electorate is apparently undecided and Labour are Gaining Momentum, so who knows. By Friday morning we’ll have Found out if it’s a Tory Island or perhaps the electoral map will be Definitely Red.

Standby for the official result.